Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Girlsarethenewboys.com

WOW. Haven't checked out this blog in a while, but thought I would since a lot of my hits are still referrals from here. Just wanted to remind you guys that with the exception of this post, I am no longer posting on blogspot. My new home is at www.girlsarethenewboys.com which I've found quite cozy, and a definite upgrade! You should come visit lol. For those of you with Tumblr accounts, I've also temporarily created a page there for easier sharing - www.girlsarethenewboys.tumblr.com.

Once again, thank you so much for reading!

Monday, April 11, 2011

TELL YOUR KIDS, TELL YOUR WIFE, AND TELL YOUR HUSBAND - WE'VE MOVED!

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Oops!

Sorry for the delay but the winner of the giveaway will be announced at 7pm today. I apologize for the inconvenience.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Friday, April 8, 2011

THANK YOU!

Thanks everyone for entering my giveaway! It was nice getting to know a little bit about the people who visit my blog and fun reading some of your messages. You guys are fucking AMAZING. I'll be announcing the winner on Monday, April 11th at 7:00am PST using a random name generator. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend! You already know where I'll be tomorrow ...

TGIF - The Random Edition

In no particular order ...

Me and Eddie at the last Giants exhibition game against the A's
#1 son!
Thirsty Thursdays. 'Cuz it was THAT kinda night last night.
Dinner the other night. Whole grain tortillas ftw!
Like Rach said, FUCK YOU TINY BUDDHA!
Last Sunday at Straits.
Free champagne courtesy of the "confused" guy!

Straight to the bar for happy hour and the Giants game!
And yes, I am a Britney Spears fan.
I ain't even gonna apologize for it either lol.

"Trying to say goodbye but it’s hot and heavy
You touch me and it’s breaking me down
I’m telling you let’s just give it up and get down"

Stupid Is, Stupid Does

It never ceases to amaze me that some of the smartest people I know make the most STUPID decisions. And whether man, woman, Filipino, or Black, Pulitzer Prize winner or magna cum laude - these decisions usually almost always involve matters of love.

We can build bridges, fly to the moon, and find cures for various diseases but walking away from a relationship we know is all wrong sometimes befuddles us more than AP calculus. She can manage budgets, schedules, and 37 employees - yet CAN'T manage to NOT answer the phone when HE calls. And he can manage to eat a dozen atomic chicken wings in under two minutes, drink 15 shots of Patron to the face like it's water, and bench 250lbs - yet CAN'T manage to NOT call HER on a beautiful afternoon.

So what fucking gives? We do. We give a damn, and we give our all. And when it comes to love, we give a shit about logic. Sometimes we give and give and give until we think we can't give anymore. And then he shows up at our door, or she takes care of us when we're sick, and we end up giving just a little. bit. more.

I know. It's fucking stupid. But I get it. That's why regardless of how I may roll my eyes at your stories, or call you an idiot, or wanna shake the shit outta you - I still love you afterwards. 'Cuz we've all been there, and that's the main reason it's so frustrating. Because I can empathize. No matter how many times we fall and then say we won't take it there again - we will. Maybe we'll try a different perspective or take a different approach, but if you're like me and your heart is as strong as your head is stubborn - we will do it all again.

We can make a dollar outta 15 cents but when it comes to love and common sense? Some things never change.

My First Giveaway!

BTW, I do have new posts below this entry and will continue to post daily.

I wish you guys could all see just how bad I am at vlogging. I tried on three separate occasions and did at least five takes each time. That's like half an hour of me saying "um" every other word and staring at the ceiling. So because I respect your brain cells, I decided to save the video for another time ... like maybe next week when I announce the winner for my very first giveaway!

I don't think you guys quite understand just how much your comments, re-tweets, re-posts, emails, EXISTENCE, etc. mean to me. But to show just a hint of my appreciation, I'll be randomly picking one lucky reader to receive a goody-bag courtesy of the good folks at Adapt Clothing, Hellz Bellz, and Universal Music.

All you have to do is leave a comment on this post with your name, age, email address, and location. I will not be using your email address for any reason other than to verify the winner and make sure it is only one entry per person.

I will be accepting entries until 5:30pm PST this Friday, April 8th and will be announcing the winner Monday, April 11th. And just to let you know this is open to both male and female readers. Fellas, I got you. I won't have you wearing Hella Kitty booty shorts. I mean ... unless that's your thang thang. Anyway, thank you so much once again and good luck!
Click on image to enlarge.
-1 item from Adapt's Spring 2011 line
-Complete Dagger Bellz Club lapel set
-CDs from various Universal Music Artist

P.S. I will not be approving comments 'cuz I'm scared spammers or weirdos will get a hold of your info and I don't want to be liable for the viagara and butt plug emails you may get.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Dress You Up in My Love Pt. 2

It's no secret, ladies love a man in uniform. Some show authority (cop), some show bravery (fire-fighter), and some show athleticism (basketball). But all show a man in his element. Comfortable, and confident - and that's always a good look. The following in no particular order, are my favorite "uniforms" (or uniform paraphernalia) on a man. Ladies, feel free to add your own. Fellas, yall got six months 'til Halloween, MAKE IT HAPPEN.

1. Dress blues on a Marine: My, what a big rifle you have there Mr. Marine Man. Not too sure why, but this is the only marine uniform I'm really attracted to and I want to say it's the high collar. I'm assuming he feels all stuffy in it and can't wait for me to rip it offa him. And then there's the gloves. Something about him having to keep 'em clean that makes me wanna do dirty, dirty things to them.


2. Gun holsters: Especially when they're under a suit or on a "plain clothes cop." I think I've been watching too many reruns of New York Undercover and Training Day. But it's always a nice little element of surprise to find something hard and powerful, under a mans clothes. Besides, the man that stays "strapped" stays ready. Best believe pun intended lol.

3. A stethoscope: 'Cuz you know, all doctors in real life are as hot as McSteamy on Greys Anatomy (although this isn't a good picture of him and he looks way better shirtless). But honestly, you don't even need to be a doctor. A murse works just fine long as you have a stethoscope and it's wrapped around your neck like that. Makes me almost wanna run around nekkid in the rain just so I can catch pneumonia and be taken cared of.

4. Construction worker: OK. I'm sorry for you construction worker fans out there but no visual here. The only pics I could find online were shirtless beefy-cakey dudes who were nowhere near my type or the village people. Granted, a construction workers typical attire consist of just a white tee, Tims/work boots, jeans, and a protective hat. But add muscles, a little sweat, and a man who ain't afraid to work hard and get dirty? It's really all you need.

5. SF Giants Uniform (the jersey essentially): As if you didn't already know.

P.S. Don't worry, I will be doing a ladies version of this for my 5 male readers lol. Got you boo-boo.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Todays Special - Stuffed Bell Peppers

Copped this recipe from Poor Girl Eats Well (thanks Hayati!) and must say I enjoyed it much more than Giada's from the other night. Simple and I made enough stuffing for a stir-fry for lunch tomorrow, and fajitas for dinner!

I love taking pictures of vegetables 'cuz of the colors.
So the recipe consist of lean steak, brown rice, broccoli, peas, bell peppers, onions, garlic, and a little cumin and cayenne pepper.
And the finished product!
BTW, remember I blogged about it being easy to be excited for something but hard to STAY excited? Mostly, because we are a society based on results? The same concept can be applied to me and grocery shopping. I've never stuck with it this long before. But as soon as I saw just how much money I saved, I've been pretty consistent for the past month. Now, if only I can apply this to the gym ...

Fowl Play

'Cuz writing yesterdays post reminded me of this ...

Years ago I was in the car with my boyfriend and one of his boys. His boy had a girlfriend at the time, yet proceeded to talk about this other girl he was fucking with. I gave him the side-eye and a disapproving sigh but kept my mouth shut. I think he read the profanities in my mind 'cuz immediately after he retorted, "I know, I know. But yall chicks love dudes with girlfriends!" To which I replied, "Correction: chicken heads." We smiled at each other.

A few weeks ago, my boy on FaceBook posed the question, "Why is that when a guy is in a relationship, it seems as if women are throwing booty at him like coins in a wishing well?" The consensus of the women who replied was that we want what we can't have. When we see a man that has a girlfriend, we assume he has qualities that make him boyfriend material and rather go after him than a single guy.

*blank stare*

I wanted to reply that it's because these women have no respect for relationships OR themselves, but didn't want to end up on an episode of "When BIRDS attack," so I refrained. I mean, I get the concept. I just refuse to understand the logic. I know it's bad to judge but I'M JUDGING lol. Mainly, 'cuz these are usually the same females talking about, "It's so hard to find a good man." While that may be true, it doesn't justify you fucking someone else's. Granted, no man ever actually gets stolen from another woman unless he wants to be "taken" to begin with but I digress.

Bruno Mars once crooned, "I'm no angel, but I'm not that bad." And I've never been one to be more attracted to a man because of the mere fact he had a girlfriend. I couldn't even lust over T.I. the same way after he married Tiny! (I'm really upset about this by the way.) This doesn't make these men less attractive. Nor does it mean I'll stop checking those guys out out. But once I find out a man is in a committed relationship, it's almost as if this "DO NOT TRESPASS" force-field automatically goes up.

Don't get me wrong. When I see a man - a fine one at that, faithful to his woman it's a definite turn-on. But seeing him happy and in love turns me off to the idea of wanting to be with him. Ladies, you ain't winnin just because you stole someone's man. A winner knows she deserves more than someone else's boyfriend. So do yourselves a favor and don't be a chicken-head. That shit's just foul.

This song is actually irrelevant to this post but since we talkin 'bout birds lol.

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Dear Diary - Today's Special

Bfast: I finally found a way to make the whole grain Cheerios taste good - blueberries! I tried strawberries and bananas but they still didn't do it.
Tried out a Giada's Penne pasta with spinach sauce recipe last night and FAILED my first round. It called for three cloves of garlic, which to a person like me of course means six. Yah, hi. I forgot it's only ok to do that when it's COOKED garlic. Shit had so much bite after two bites I couldn't fathom another. It had more kick than wasabi and I had to do it again. Verdict was: NOMZ! However, I'd add chicken and mushrooms next time.

Really simple recipe nevertheless. Reduced fat cream cheese, garlic, salt, pepper, goat cheese, and spinach for the sauce. And whole grain penne pasta, with a sprinkle of parm on top. Bon appetite!

Quench Your Thirst

A girlfriend of mine told me how she went out with the guy she was seeing and some of his friends to Circolo the other weekend. She spoke of how much fun they had, how good the drinks were, and how the one white guy in the group c-walked his way into her heart. She then told me about the sorry excuse for a woman that offered her dude her number while she was in the bathroom. "Your girl ain't gotta know," she said. Except she did know. And later returned the broads side-eye with a flirtatious wink that really meant, "Yeah bitch, keep lookin 'cuz he came with me and he's going home with me."

It reminded me of this one time I was out with my dude ordering drinks at the bar. I noticed a pretty girl and her friend to the right of us and immediately knew she was feeling my guy. How did I know? 'Cuz the chick was staring at him hug and kiss and put his arms around me ALL FUCKING NIGHT.

Remember when I said I wasn't insecure? I'm not. Couldn't blame her for checking him out. She was simply confirming what I already knew; I got good taste. I just wish she didn't take her sweet ass obvious time confirming it. Because staring at someone's date that hard for that long is just borderline disrespectful to me. And I was one cranberry vodka away from giving her the head nod and saying, "He's handsome isn't he? ... And he's fucking my brains out in about an hour".

Of course I didn't say anything. I'm too grown and secure for that shit. Plus, I like my face lol. But it was the first time something like that had ever happened to me. And I couldn't help but empathize with some of you fellas, including the one I was with that night. 'Cuz everytime I go out I witness some bold ass guy think he's Trey Songz and attempt to Mr. Steal ya Girl while you're being a good man and putting your girls jacket in coat check. I know all is fair in love and war, but telling me, "That's who you're with? Naw you don't want him to get you a drink. You want ME to get you a drink," when my guy is right next to me are FIGHTING WORDS.

It's a constant reminder of just how cold the game can be. It's survival of the fittest. Love is a battlefield and men and women alike both fight dirty. I've come to learn that some men don't give a fuck about no man code, and that you can't have woman to woman intuition with bird ass bitches.

But to play devil's advocate here, these lames don't have to give a fuck about you. So you shouldn't give a fuck about them. They don't owe you shit. But the person you rolled to the spot with? The man who said they're exclusively dating you? The chick who told you she's not seeing anyone else? They owe you at least the respect to not entertain these people back.

As for you thirsty ass females tryna take a sip from MY tall glass of water? Go find your own bird bath. Now choke on that.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Music Monday

Apparently, Sunday is the new Saturday. I just wish someone told me ahead of time. Too lazy to upload pics from the weekend but here's a little music for your Monday. Drove to work today with the sun beaming and my Tone Tony Toni Pandora station playing that CRACK SHIT.

Joy/Pain Ride

He's not what you want, but he's exactly what you need ... right now.

Who knows how long you'll be able to detach your feelings from his embrace at night, but you figure you'll continue to spend time and have fun with him until the time you spend with him is no longer fun.

Because he feeds you, and makes you feel beautiful. He lets you hold his three fingers while you walk, and places his hand on your thigh when you rest your head on his shoulder. He takes care of you, and carries you from the couch to the bed when you're too tired to get up. He kisses, and hugs, and snuggles, and caresses, and knows exactly what position makes you explode.

And all the reasons you want to stay are all the reasons you want to leave.

Because you're five days away from your deadline. Four dates away from going off on him. Three clicks away from the "truth." Two strikes away from taking it back THERE. And one pitcher away from pouring your heart out.

But he's so convenient. And you're so lonely. And he's right there. Staring at you. Looking like a sexy motherfucker. Making you feel like it's the first date all over again. But it's not. And you already know. He's the wrong person at the right time. But he'll do, for right now.

So you guess you'll just go along for the ride. Until a shinier, more reliable car comes and swoops you up.

Or maybe you'll just fucking walk. You could use the exercise anyway.

Friday, April 1, 2011

TGIF - LYL Edition

Tell her she's beautiful. Tell him he's handsome. Tell her she's the only one you're seeing even if she's not your girlfriend. Tell him he's appreciated more than he could ever know. Tell her you're sorry. Tell him you're proud of him. Tell her you love her. Tell him you miss him. Hug your friends. Pick up your phone. Smile at people on the street. Go to your best friends house and do nothing. Have girls night outs. Be there for your boys. Plan dinners and brunches for no reason at all. Turn off your phone. Read a book. Enjoy the sunshine. Play in the rain. Cook dinner. Have lunch by yourself. Take a walk. Baby-sit your favorite lil' man or Princess. Eat something really bad for you. Eat something really good for you. Stop and smell the flowers. Take a deep breath.

Don't wait for excuses to love life. And don't wait for reasons to appreciate the people in it. Don't wait 'til it's too late.

Have a beautiful weekend. Got a little something for yall come Monday ;)

STILL.



In my eyes and ears Tamia is one of the baddest in the game and definitely underrated. Lil' mama got big vocals, and I could listen to her Tamia and More album beginning 'til end. One of my favorite tracks of hers is "Still," which I'm sure is dedicated to her husband of 11 years, Grant Hill. Check out her live performance above with a special appearance by her hubby at the end. Guaranteed to make you feel all warm and toasty inside. Living in a world where it seems as if no one values marriage or even love/relationships anymore, this song and couple give me hope.

"Still, feels like the first time we met
And I kissed and I told you I love you
We still run around like teenagers
Even though we're grown and married with kids
And we still talk on the phone for hours when I'm away
He still writes letters and sends me flowers every other day
The question everybody asks, Is how we make it last
I tell him I still, he still - WE STILL"

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Giants Season Starts NOW.


I promise to try and not bore you with my baseball banter until at least a few more months. Weeks. OK at least not until my first game opening night lol.

If You Do For Me

Remember when I wrote this blog and told you I've been feelin all Notebook, A Walk to Remember lately? Well mama ain't neva lie and the "yes homo" is stronger than ever.

Just yesterday while scoring the basketball game, I noticed a few players come in early and set up shop at the bleachers across from me. Along with some of them came friends, family, kids, and significant others. Among them was one woman I had seen the week before. A girlfriend of one of the players. She sat by herself, guarded her mans stuff while he played, and took pictures everytime he stepped up to the free-throw line. It was cute, and I couldn't help but empathize because it could've easily been me. Except I wouldn't have came in high heels with my hair all did, and I would've been screaming and cheering like an obnoxious asshole.

Because what good woman doesn't want to support her man and be there for him when he's in his element? Whether it be when he's on the field, behind the mic, in the kitchen, or overseeing a business, I want to be his #1 fan (or at least #2 'cuz I ain't tryna fight moms for that spot).

The homie Jeyel asked me this morning what I missed most about having a boyfriend. Its been so long, I had to think about it. Was it him dropping me off at work and kissing me good-bye? No. Him picking me up from work and kissing me hello? No. Him giving me massages? No (although it's definitely up there!). Him taking care of me when I'm sick? No. Him buying me "for nothing" gifts? No.

Then I realized that more than anything, I missed doing things for him.

Like making him lunch and sticking post-it notes on his tupperware. Seeing something that would look good on him and buying it "just because". Sexting him at inappropriate times. Making him french toast for breakfast in just his t-shirt while he's still sleeping. Tying his tie for him. Folding his laundry. Surprising him with tickets to his favorite game and not even expecting to go. Cooking him dinner and skipping the dining room to eat it at the coffee table while watching Jersey Shore on the couch. And finding him the BEST birthday or Christmas gift everrrrrr. So amazering, I almost give it to him early because I just can't wait 'til it hits midnight. Little things like that.

Which is actually pretty ironic. Because I barely cook for myself. I have yet to learn how to tie a tie. I absolutely detest folding my own laundry. And OF COURSE I wanna go to the damn game!

But that's the thing. I may not want to do certain things for myself but I have to. I may not have to do these certain things for my man but I want to. Some girls can sucker a sucker into buying her a shiny new toy, or taking her on a weekend getaway if she really wanted them to. And some girls may tolerate shit because they feel helpless, as if they have no choice or "have" to. But it takes a really special man to make us WANT to go above and beyond at times, and do things for them for the most unselfish reasons.

So I guess ... that's what I really miss the most about having a boyfriend. Or rather, what I miss having him do for me. As corny as it sounds, I miss him giving me that amazing feeling of simply wanting to do things for him.

Folks what's you're favorite part of being in a relationship whether you're in one right now or not?

P.S. Bout to show my age here but I love this song. Probably more now than I did back then.

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

Brace Yourselves.

'Cuz Giants season is starting lol. I was lucky enough to get paid to watch their last exhibition game today at AT&T Park. Up until the bottom of the 9th the A's lead 1-0 and many "fans" had already left or were making their way out of the stadium. Finally, Fonte-yes gets on base, steals, and Whiteside brings his ass home 1-1. Then, like a scene out of a movie at 2 outs and 2 strikes Stewart (who to be real honest I'm not even familiar with) singles just past third base and it's a motherfucking ballgame! And now it's 5:30 and still 70+ degrees outside, time to go celebrate the sweep and this beautiful day with a run.


Happy Birthday Kristina!

Happy birthday to my chinita Kristina, love you mama!
I'll be playing the "maniac" song today in your honor lol.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Feeling Your Breast.

One of my favorite pair of celebrity boobs.

Being the bi-polar blogger I am, I would write about wanting things I can't have the day after I write about how fly I'm feeling. But let's face it, I have a vagina. That right there should explain it all. Thing is, in no way am I insecure. However, I do lack self-confidence. Does that even make sense? Hope so. That being said, I will always feel that there will be certain aspects of my personality that can be improved. I'm excited to work on these things because life is about growing as a person. But then, there come the things you can't change i.e. physical appearance, i.e. MY TITS.

Tits, tets, titties, tittays, tatas, boobs, boobies, breast, breasteses, jangs, melons, rack, cha-chas, honkers, headlights, hooters, knockers - whatever you wanna fucking call them, I will always want them. They just look so fun to have! Like a close confidant that'll never leave your side - err - front, you can always count on them. They make for nice head rest, and look awesome in tube tops, bikinis, and my personal favorite - v-neck shirts.

Going back to last Saturday when I was tooting my own horn, I'm pretty convinced that God didn't give me big boobs 'cuz he knew he would've created a MONSTER. Either that, or he knew it would've been a waste 'cuz I wouldn't know how to connivingly use them to my advantage. But the things I'd do with them if given the chance. Yes folks, I have a boobie bucket list, with titty-fucking on the top of it.

I know, I know, why right? WELL WHY THE HELL NOT?! I know it physically couldn't feel that good for me, but just to know that I could make some dude nut off of that alone is pretty cool. Second, on that list would be flashing someone. Not even for beads or a free drink, but just to brighten someone's day because I'm a joyous person like that. I mean imagine you're a dude waking up on the wrong side of the bed, getting in your car dreading to go to work. Then, at the light the chick next to you with the amazing rack says good morning and lifts up her shirt. Tell me that wouldn't put a smile on your face?

Lastlyl, I think I'd just buy a whole bunch of pretty bras, try them on, and stare at my tits in them. For at least a good half hour straight. I know that sounds kinda weak but even more than other people liking the way they look, I'd want to like the way they look even more.

Because when all is said and done, regardless of how many people tell you this and that - if you don't believe it yourself, it ain't nothing but noise.

So while I'll always have an infatuation with big, natural breast and tasteful implants, I could never get a boob job. For one, I'm too much of a hypochondriac to go through the actual surgery. And I really like being able to go top-commando sometimes. In about 10 years, I won't have to worry too much about them being down to my knees, and honestly, hearing my double deezy endowed friends complain about back aches doesn't sound so hot.

I find nothing wrong with altering your appearance whether naturally or via Dr. 90210, as long as you're doing it for yourself. You shouldn't have to go out and get botox, or breast implants, or butt injections for the things you lack (or in some cases i.e. lypo you have too much of). Instead, go out and find a guy that loves you and thinks you're beautiful because of the things you ALREADY have.

I once had a guy tell me my itty-bitties were "perfect." It was the first time anyone had ever said anything like that to me about my body, what more about the part of my body that was practically non-existent. But it was really nice to hear because I know he meant it. I don't think they're "perfect," but I suppose they're perfect for me so I might as well have fun with them. Besides, I'd like to think I have bigger things to offer than just my cup-size.

BTW - the worst part about all of this wasn't that she was fine the way she was, or even that she looks like a completely different person - but that she did it for her anti-christ of a husband *smh* Heidi didn't need plastic surgery, she needed a therapist. And a hug.

Head Over Heels

DAMN. This song used to be my pajama-jammy-JAM! Quit playin. It's a beautiful day outside, it's about to be for the next two, I got a half day tomorrow, and Nas is looking all skinny in the face and scrumptious in the vid. Can one of you DJs play this song at the club so I can crush on the next person that walks by me so I can dance with them? Thanks. Yeah, I'm totally giggin in my seat at work right now, and you should be too!



"You prolly heard that my pipe game tight,
Rockin VVS stones, powder blue whips with egg headlights ..."

p.s. I think it's funny how I still remember all of the lyrics to this song and can't remember shit from algebra lol. #educationfail

The Random in Pictures

From the weekend and then some.

Brunch with Q, Gelo, and Rach at Le Boulange where I had the smoked salmon fritata.


HELLA moded and HELLA not planned lol.
Drinks at the W.
How dirty girls get clean. Or, drunk.
Bathroom pic 'cuz I liked my recycled outfit from the Dwele concert.
BTW, still doing the grocery shopping thing.
Slacked for half a week though because I didn't have time to go grocery shopping.
Spaghetti is seriously the easiest thing on Earth to make lol. I just substitute the ground beef with ground turkey and use whole wheat noodles, and add garlic, mushrooms, and fresh basil to the sauce. Mushrooms, avocado, goat cheese, and light ranch dressing for the salad. I think I'm going to try and make the sauce from scratch next time so it's more flavorful.

So glad Mother Nature took a break yesterday and allowed me to run this. All the rain washed away most of the beach, there was barely any sand to run on so I opted for the Great Highway. Still not sure why it's closed down. Looks kinda creepy if you ask me.


Last nights dinner that I forgot to bring to work for lunch - DAMMIT TO HELL! Lemon basil & garlic (skinless) chicken filets with brown rice and turkey bacon wrapped asparagus.


Blessing and a Curse

Sitting at the bar of a posh hotel does wonders for a woman's self-esteem. Last Saturday, as I was stirring three olives in my exxxtra dirty martini at the XYZ bar of the W hotel, I caught a whiff of my own freshly washed hair and thought to myself, "Damn, I smell good." Needless to say, I was feelin myself that night and I am not the least bit ashamed, because it was ALL ME. And it's been a while since I genuinely felt good about myself without the validation from someone else.

The best part was I felt good for every woman in that room.

With their long, shiny hair smelling like orgasm in a bottle. With their four-inch stilettos and tight fitting dresses that hug every curve of their bodies. With their plump lips, beautiful smiles, and batting eyelashes. With their cute laughs, and raspy voices.

Slim, thick, tall, short - women are fucking gorgeous. Even some of the ugly ones lol. We smell good, and have soft skin. And the really awesome ones? They speak their minds and stand their ground all while still making you feel like the motherfucking MAN.

It may come effortless to some, while the rest of us take nearly an hour to get ready but either way we take pride in ourselves and care about how we look when we step outside the house and spend an evening with YOU.

Even my man friend I was hanging out with that night said, "Women are the best thing ever to come into a man's life." I shook my head and laughed. I'd like to agree. It's no wonder some of yall can't be with just one.

Monday, March 28, 2011

GUCCI!

Currently on repeat. I've always loved this beat.

Waiting for Saturn

Today is March 28th and I am approximately six months away from turning 30. FUCK MY FUCKING LIFE.

By now I should've been a successful fashion designer living in the San Mateo hills, married for 3 years with one child, and pregnant with my second. Instead, I'm a single, aspiring writer renting an in-law.

Surprisingly enough, I am having the time of my life.

The rumors I once thought were blasphemous are true: "30s the new 20, I'm so hot still." I know I sound like some old fart trying to make myself feel better for being ancient, but I can honestly say that the older I get, the more fun I have.

When I turned 25 I experienced my first of many quarter life crisis. I seriously thought my life was over. Now four years later, I feel as if it's just beginning. I know exactly what I want in life, in a partner, in a career, and in myself. And honey let me tell you, I've been having sex since I was 16 but I don't think I've ever had SEX until this past year so just to let you know - it only gets better. But I digress.

I used to look at 21-23 year olds and wish I could take it there once again. But then I remember what an even hotter mess I was back then. I embarked on a world of credit card debt, struggled with reporting classes, hated my customer service job, had bad skin, didn't talk to my mom for a year, and did dumb shit like get into screaming matches in the parking lot of Denny's with my non-boyfriend. I had less responsibilities but I was too young and naive to take advantage of it. I spent so much time planning the future and relying on things that weren't guaranteed, that I never got to enjoy the present and appreciate what was right in front of me.

I'm not gonna lie. I still have a tendency to count my chickens before they hatch and feel ungrateful. Sometimes I still have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. But now I know this is OK. How boring would life be if we weren't constantly learning? If today was as good as it gets? The biggest difference between me at 23 and me at 29 asides from a faster metabolism and flatter stomach, is I'm actually excited about what the future has in store for me.

So beautiful, young people of the world with your toned bodies, and high alcohol tolerances - I no longer hate or envy you (well, maybe just a little). I am ecstatic for you. You think you're having fun now? You just wait and see.

'Cuz even if you don't end up where you thought you'd be, trust that you'll end up exactly where you should be.

Friday, March 25, 2011

"Live without pretending, Love without depending, Listen without defending, Speak without offending."~Unknown

TGIF - Just 'Cuz Edition

'Cuz I shouldn't even have to explain Katerina Graham.

'Cuz I swear I'd revoke my own Godmother pass if she wasn't so adorable.
Plus, I want her onesie (complete w/ detachable mittens and hoody with ears!!!)

"'Cuz my anaconda don't want none unless you got BUNZ hun!"
Vegas, if you know what's good for you, you'll check out the homiez over at Tasty Bunz.
'Cuz this is the mufuckin TRUF.

'Cuz all the cool Bellz are doing it, cop here.

'Cuz I'm pale, I'm tubby, and I'm running out of winter shit to wear.
Summer, where for art thou?
Happy Friday everyone, have an amazering weekend!

HOLY FUCKING SHIT I DIE NOW.

Yall don't even understand right now. My X-Men card collection would've shitted on yours ANY FUCKING DAY. So it only makes sense that my favorite comic book misfits meet my favorite baseball outcasts. klajsdlkfjskljfkljdklfjljsdlfjasdfjlsjlajoiwojfs. Words cannot describe how happy I would be to get my hands on this, and I don't even like comic books!




Hocus-Focus

About a year ago my gay at work suggested I write down a list of things I wanted in life, tangible or not. Big, or small. It didn't matter, long as I was specific. The idea was nothing new to me, I had read many inspirational articles and listened to numerous motivational speeches referencing this type of exercise. Finally, I decided to give it a try. On the top of my list was, "Have a successful and lucrative career doing what I love to do." I read this list every morning, and every night right before I went to bed. After maybe three or four days I got an email regarding a paid copywriting gig.

Of course my eyes widened as I read the email thinking, "HOLY SHIT, IT'S LIKE MAGIC!" So one would think I would've continued the self-fulfilling prophecy and kept up with the list but I abandoned it only a week later. Matter fact, my world kinda fell apart shortly after. What can I say? Shit happens, and you fall down or in my case you spiral into an abyss. Then you either stay spiraling and let the world pass you by or you get up, grab life by the throat and choke that bitch into submission ... or at least work out some sort of compromise.

So here I am a year later with the same stars in my eyes. Only they're brighter, and I can see clearer than ever. While perusing Facebook today, I randomly came across a link to a renovated warehouse/living space my friend posted. I immediately thought of my "dream house," which you'd be surprised to find out is a lot more realistic than you'd think. I only have a few absolute musts - with an infinity pool being the most outrageous lol. Honestly, as long as I have a washer and dryer inside the house, I'm good. I'm a simple girl. The 2-car garage, second-story, and walk in closet are just an added bonus ;)

Anyway, I'm printing out these pictures today and posting them all over my cubicle walls. To remind myself that I deserve better and am capable of so much more. More than likely, you are too. So write a list (check it twice!), find pictures of shit that motives you. Listen to inspiring stories like this one about Sylvester Stallone, and surround yourself with positive people that spark fires in your soul. Do whatever you have to do to FOCUS.

It's easy to get excited, but it takes real effort to STAY excited. Maybe because we are so used to basing success on results. New Years hits and you get a gym membership and go hard for the first three weeks and then come the fourth and you're over it. But had you acquired a 2-pack during that fourth week, I'm sure you would've been more inclined to continue beasting it so that 2-pack turns into 4, and eventually working out becomes second nature to you.

Remember: Ideas, no matter how good they are - are NOTHING without execution. And you won't get to swim in your infinity pool, or fill up your walk-in closet if you're just staring at them from your cubicle.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

BroTip#83 Should be PeopleTip#3

Mad Over Maddox!

You see that look on his face? It is a look of explosive adoration for his Aunty-Abi NOT annoyance. I SWEAR lol. Happy 1st birthday sweetness. Can't wait to see you rock your very first Giants hoody!


P.S. Janners Bananners, I don't think I've told you this yet but I am VERY proud of you!