Friday, December 18, 2009

Have Your Cock and Eat it Too

Yesterday I trekked 12 blocks in the ghetto during my lunch break (I thought the spot was on 6th, it was on 9th FML) and missed my lunch for some goddamn cock ... cake. But all the penis jokes that went on throughout the night made it very well worth it (Excuse me would u like some nut sack?). Below is the conversation I had with the folks from The Cake Gallery SF when I called to order my cake. It was too hilarious not to post. And once again, Happy Hayati Birthday!"

CG: Hello Cake Gallery
Me: Hi! I'd like to order a cock cake for Thursday?!
CG: Sure, no problem. What size?
Me: I'd like a mini cock please, there's only a few of us sharing it.
CG: Would u like a caucasian cock? A hispanic cock? Or an African American cock?
Me: As pale as possible. My girl is an Edward Cullen fan. You know, from that movie Twilight?
CG: Oh yes!
Me: And they're really pale and shit.
CG: OK so light as possible.
Me: Yes pls.
CG: And what kind of filling for your cock?
Me: Strawberry cake with fresh bananas.
CG: Great.
Me: I have a special request. Edward sparkles when he's in the sun. Do u guys have crystal looking sprinkles so the cock "glitters?"
CG: We sure do!
Me: Perfect.
CG: And would u like cum shooting off the top of the cake?
Me: Hmmmm. Good question. I actually wanted something written on it if possible.
CG: A popular choice is "Make a wish and blow"
Me: Let me call u back while I attempt to be clever ...

6 comments:

yoshi said...

the BEST

ashley sade said...

LOL that shit is funny. do they literally make any type of cake!?

Mouf.Peace said...

yes if u ever need an "erotic" cake go there. it's cutty but they get the job done. they got ass cakes, titty cakes, gay cakes, lesbian cakes, threesome cakes, cougar cakes, vagina cakes, vagina/cock/titty lollipops, erthang hahahaha.

k_tran9400 said...

hahahaah!!

DJ CMC said...

humm...i think i coulda made a more realistic lookin vampire cock...NO HOMO of course! LOL

cataLin0 said...

ooo FYI yall, i'm an ass man, preferably Not as pale as that, however, i do not discriminate... i wonder if they would be able to help me out. Cake-wise that is. hhahaa

@CMC you got them hand skills like that?!