"I ain't played the cards I was dealt, I changed my cards.
I prayed to the skies and I changed my stars"~Kanye West, Last Call
I used to think me and my first love were destined to be together. Because for 11 years we lived 1 block away from each other. For 10 years, we attended the same church where we unknowingly checked each other out. For 8 years, he was friends with my cousin who I lived with. And for 6 years, we slept over the same neighborhood baby-sitters house but never ran into each other.
It wasn't until that 11th year that we finally met. We didn't hit it off right away. Matter of fact, we stopped talking for about a month. Until one day, I saw a Pizza Hut commercial about bread sticks that reminded me of him and I called him up. The rest as they say, is history.
I used to think that there was a reason we didn't meet until that 11th year. That had we met earlier, we would'nt have lasted as long as we did. But then that would that mean it was predetermined for that Pizza Hut commercial to air when it did and that ultimately, bread sticks were responsible for the next 10 years of my love life?
I highly doubt it.
But movies like Only You and books like The Celestine Prophecy have us pondering about coincidences that are too much of a coincidence to be JUST a coincidence. Some people believe everything happens for a reason. Some people create their own destiny. Yet others say fate takes you to a certain extent and then it is up to you what you want to happen from there.
What do I believe? I believe that "What you see is what you get, for every cause there's an effect." Our current state is a direct result of the decisions we've made earlier in our lives, whether it was made years, months, days, or even minutes ago. And that ultimately, shit just happens! Maybe I'm jaded, but I truly believe that everything I have (and don't have) right now, I have because I WORKED HARD (or didn't work hard enough) for it. It doesn't have to be so complicated. A person pushes a fly whip 'cuz they saved up the funds, orrrrr their parents are rich. Either way, unless a comet named Mercedes CL550 landed on someone's old Civic right after they inherited money and just as they were trying to figure out what kinda new car to get - the cosmos had nothing to do with it.
It's not being cynical, it's being realistic. I love Serendipity type endings, but while you're sitting there looking at the stars, waiting for them to align, you might miss the one right in front of your face. You can sit there and wait for shit to happen, or you can make shit happen. It's like that Abraham Lincoln quote, "Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle." If fate and karma and all that other woompty-woomp are for real? Well, then it must be my destiny to hustle. And if not, at least I'll be doing something productive while waiting for fate to take place.
totally where i'm feeling my state of life is at right now. shits just not gonna land in my hands if i don't do anything about it. so i'm trying to better manage my life to have a better outcome in the future. thanks for your post.
I've never met you, but read your comment on untiligetmarried.com's post about the 5 ways facebook has ruined (assumably) women's chances with him.
How did I get to Manifest Destiny? A friend of mine messaged the post (5 ways) to me on FB, I read through the post, read the comments, found yours kinda clever, started to read your most recent post, and ultimately ended up at this point. How's that for a little cause and effect?
So, what am I commenting for? Well, let me pre-empt my response by saying that this shit will probably end up being incomplete because I don't yet know if I'm in the state necessary to be able to develop a keen-enough response to the topics you've amalgamated together in a song quote, six paragraphs, and a sentence.
Whether or not I'm in that state, I (obviously) couldn't resist concocting some sort of response to it. Really, one could write a book exploring a perspective to all the topics involved in your post. Okay, I've changed my mind. Or, I've refined my thoughts because I realize that there is a book that is an essential read to anyone exploring their beliefs in destiny, and its relationship to free will, romance, success ... shit, sounds almost like the beginning of an advertisement, huh? I am not a spammer (one hand on my heart, one open hand raised with the palm to your face).
If this book hasn't been recommended to you already:
The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho.
It might change your life. Or, maybe it was destiny that I was to read your post, and suggest that you read that book? ... 0_0
Sometimes I have too much fun that other people wouldn't be able to get without the nonverbals. Anyway.
Maybe we'll cross paths again, or maybe we won't. It's more likely I'll be some stranger that becomes the bud of a joke in a conversation with friends--in which case I'd only be a bit amused myself that I could add a little enjoyment to a world that's too often absorbed with depression and insecurity because of some variety of not living excessively enough.
Found your words refreshing, though. You may have just inspired me to start blogging again. Though, keeping my thoughts between blue ink has been serving me pretty well since I need a fucking FB addiction patch for every time my fingers hit my keyboard.
@michelle - glad to have been of service. don't get me wrong, it's not that i'm NOT a believer of destiny, i just believe more on making things happen. and then like they say if it's meant to be it'll be lol.
@era - http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a167/Bitch_Made/Photo68.jpg
i guess we'll just have to see :)
and you should definitely start writing again. whether it be on blogspot, paper, napkins, whatever...
@era - p.s. i first read the book in i think 2004? it didn't mean much to me at the time. maybe if i read it again now, it'll be the right time.
The "right" time. It's possible it may be more appropriate now, than it had been. But, probable that the words will adhere more significantly than six years before.
Some rationale: It's likely that over the past six years, you'll have collected more experiences: more celebrations, more (808s and) heartbreak, more humor, more angst, more elation, more despair, more failures, more success ...
Achieved more familiarity with the shady areas between the extremes, increasing sensitivity to the subtle differences between situations.
I think when those processes and collections happen, it's very unlikely that re-experiencing any expression: a painting, a song, a film...
..especially a book that conveys the existence of a universe that communicates the truth to those who decide to listen...
..it's unlikely that re-experiencing (I don't think there is such a thing--but, that's a trail along the Pacific, and I'm trynna stay on the sidewalk) any expression six years later will impact the same way.
I'ma stay in the realm of probabilities. Anything is possible. But, I think when you have at Coelho again--it's inevitable that some of the words that previously floated past you will have a little more "meat" to grab on to.
And, that's probably a good thing ;)
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